Saturday, 29 January 2011

My trip home to Canada has been very different from what I expected and even now I find it hard to take it all in.  My beautiful mother passed away unexpectedly 2 days after I arrived home. 

She had been perfectly fine all day - her usual smiling happy self.  We spent the day shopping and enjoying a lobster supper (a bit of a tradition to celebrate my birthday when I get home in December with some lobster). An aunt and uncle dropped by for a visit and then Mom and Dad went to bed at 10 - Mom very excited about watching the Survivor final.  20 minutes later my father called out to me and within 2 hours she was gone.

It's been a difficult time - but my family has been amazing.  Not just my brothers and sisters, but my very large extended family who have helped us all in too many ways to mention. 

My mother was the strongest woman I know.  She was funny and generous and loving and (as anyone who ever played cards with her knows) very competitive. 

She taught me to knit when I was very young.  I still remember the excitement (really - I was excited) of getting those plastic needles and acrylic yarn and knitting those first stitches.  I was enchanted and have knit pretty much constantly since.

Ma was definitely a 'jag' knitter.  She found a pattern she liked and made LOTS of them.  Her most prolific jag was about 30 years ago when we moved into this house and she made what seemed like thousands of paris of Phentex checkerboard slippers.  We had drawers full of them and they were handed out like party favours when people dropped by.

She was the most knitworthy person in the world and I loved knitting for her.  She oohed and aahed appreciatively and then wrapped them up carefully to admire every now and then as they were clearly too nice to be worn/used.  No amount of coaxing from me or anyone else convinced her to risk it. 

She was always showing off my work to people who dropped by - and although she had never actually seen this blog she was forever passing on the address to others.  In short - she was my biggest fan.

We all miss her so much every day.  Some days are harder than others but we comfort ourselves with the knowledge that she's always with us -- in the family and love that we share. 

30 comments:

seashoreknits said...

Dear Soo:
I have never commented on your blog before, although I have been a follower for many many months.

I had to leave this note to offer you my deepest condolences on the loss of your dear mother. I simply cannot imagine a world without my mother, and so my heart breaks for you.

I loved reading the sweet reflections you gave us of your mother - she sounds like she was a truly remarkable and kind person.

My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family in this difficult time.

peace
Teresa

Helen @ Fuss Free Flavours said...

Oh Soo, I am so sorry to read that.

I was wondering what you were up to.

Your post is a wonderful tribute to your mother, and how wonderful to have been given the gift and love of knitting from her.

xx

fleegle said...

I am so sorry, Soo. My heart aches for you. I hope you can find a bit of solace and knit something beautiful in her memory.

Anonymous said...

I'm so sorry about your loss. I'm sure it was a comfort to her that you were there.

Patsy

minniemoll said...

Oh, I'm so sorry, what an awful shock for you. But at least you were there, and she enjoyed her last days. Look after yourself.

Helen xxx

Anonymous said...

I'm so sorry to hear about your mother, Soo. I am glad you were able to spend a lovely day with her.
Kimmen

Sarah said...

Oh Soo, I am so very sorry for your loss. I have been reading here for years, but never comment. I lost my Dad very suddenly (heart attack) when he was 59 and I was 24. I know how hard it is, I really do. Wishing you strength and peace...

Lucette said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Lucette said...

Soo, so sorry to hear about your mom. She sounds like a wonderful person who will be greatly missed.
I lost my dad seven years ago and I know how sad it feels. lots of peace to you and your family.

Donna said...

Soo, I'm so, so sorry for your loss - I hope it's a small comfort that we're thinking about your mom with you and keeping your family close in our thoughts.

ojgirl said...

I'm so sorry for your loss - may you find peace and comfort in knowing that many have you and yours in their thoughts and prayers.

Joan said...

Dear Soo,

My heart goes out to you and your family.

janiannie said...

I was so sad to read this post and join everyone else in sending my sympathy to you and the rest of your family.
I'm sure you will take comfort from those last precious days you spent together.

LittleBerry said...

Oh Soo I am so sorry to hear of your sad & sudden loss. I know how you feel both I and my husband lost both our fathers within 18 months of each other when we were just 27. Take heart that every time you knit a stitch that your mother is with you and without her you wouldn't have your gift to create the most exquiste pieces you do...

Alice said...

I'm so sorry for your loss, but also so glad that you were able to be there. I'm sending peaceful thoughts to your and your family.

Anonymous said...

I am so sorry for your loss. Yet glad that you were able to be there and have such a good day with your Mom before she passed. You are in my prayers.

M said...

I'm very sorry to hear about the loss of your mom.

Trista said...

It was harder than I had imagined it would be to lose my mother, and I had several months to ponder it while she was dying. I am so sorry for your loss and the shock of it coming suddenly for your family. My love to you all.

Susan said...

What a beautiful tribute to a talented, well-loved woman. I am so glad you had that joyful day with her. My heart goes out to you for your loss.

lv2knit said...

I am so sorry about your loss! Somehow I feel connected to her because, as you may remember, I wrote about your mother on MY blog. I called the post "Born of Envy" and wrote about the stunning Lyra you had made for your mother. I wanted that Lyra in the worst way and described how I could meet and befriend your mother and somehow abscond with my glorious prize. After reading this post, I now know that I would have loved meeting and getting to know your mom, but would never have the heart to do it!

I recently lost my mother and it creates a hole that will never be filled. My thoughts are with you.

Anonymous said...

So so sorry to hear about your Mom. What a shock it must have been for your whole family. I do hope your father is ok. Best wishes for the new year.

Anonymous said...

Thoughts and prayers heading your way. I have read your blog for a long time but have never posted. Your knitting is beautiful and such a loving tribute to your mother, who taught you well. She will be in your heart forever.

Ann said...

She will always live in your heart. Thoughts and prayers to you and your family.

√úhltje said...

Dear Soo, I'm so sorry for your loss. I hope you can find some comfort in those last happy moments.

Cat said...

Dear Soo,

Your mother sounds like a wonderful person. I'm so sorry to read of her passing. How wonderful you were able to spend such a nice day together before losing her.

Darkest Knits said...

Soo, I first saw your stunning work on the Angel Yarns/Phoenix Forums and still pop here to have a look at what you are knitting.

I am truly sorry for your loss. Your Mother sounds like an amazing lady...I too lost my Dad seven years ago and still feel the pain of his passing today.

My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family...

Barb said...

Soo,I am so saddened to hear of your mother's passing. I wish I had words to say to help, but I will say I'm glad you were there to be with her before she passed.

I've read your blog for the last few years and felt like you were a friend, which is funny, because we've never met. I wish I could give you a hug. I know this hurts. You're in my prayers.

Anonymous said...

My deepest condolences to you and your family.
My Father passed away several days after Christmas. I am still numb...it is so hard to believe that he is no longer here. I am sure you feel the same about your Mothter.
My heart grieves with you.

Rene'

Anonymous said...

So sorry to hear of your great loss.
What a wonderful lady she was! You can see it on the photo.

I have always admired your work, Soo and aspire to knit lace like you do. Your Mum must have been so proud of you.
Elina3 (Tricotine) x

Felicity from Down Under said...

I join in sending condolences and share the understanding expressed by many of the shock a sudden loss can be. You have your mother with you always in your knitting, as I have mind with me in the recipes we shared, the books she loved that are now mine and the knitting needles I use that were once hers. I apologise to her every time I do something less than perfect, even knowing that she, as I'm sure your mother, would see past the mistakes. Your mother must have been an amazing woman - I think perhaps all mothers are - and it's wonderful that her love of knitting lives on in your work.

Thank you so much for sharing it with us out here in blogland.